11:49 pm][ under the influence.

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I always thought that at some point in my life I would grow to respect love;  that I would not only forgive every negative encounter we’ve had but I would also come to understand (and appreciate, even) its twisted sense of humor.

We would become friends…or at the least, friendly.  If nothing else, there was definitely something for me to gain by cultivating a friendship with it.  How does the saying go? Keep your friends close and your enemies closer? Yeah…that.

I’m still trying to understand how something I’ve worked so hard to keep distant has remained so relevant in my life.  Everything else I manage to chase away effortlessly.

Most articles and self-help books encourage you to narrow in on the target (in other words “the problem”) – which if you haven’t learned by now is always you.  I mean…if we are being honest, who really cares who’s to blame for your “dysfunction” once you’ve reached the point of consulting scholarly articles and books about yourself.

But I can’t seem to narrow in on anything right now.  Pinot Grigio brought me here and my mind is all over the place.  I’ve been thinking a lot about my friend’s death lately and I don’t know why.  I’m also thinking about this pimple on my chin and how uncomfortable my cat is with forehead kisses.  But neither is here nor there.  Or maybe its all relevant and I don’t know…that would be life for you.  I might start writing again…or I might delete this in the morning when I make love to sobriety.  Either way, I miss you.

Nosie Josie

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JE21

About nosy josie (88 Articles)
Josie is an aspiring writer living in Chicago Illinois, inspiring self-love through her own tragicomic life journey. Follow Josie as she details her collection of dating fails, life lessons and heart-to-heart confessions with her nosy readers.

7 Comments on 11:49 pm][ under the influence.

  1. Aww, it’s so good to see you again Josie! ❤️

    Don’t leave.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Aw L, I miss you so much friend 🥰. I’m thinking of returning but not quite sure yet. I miss you much though. Are you happy and doing well?

      Liked by 1 person

      • I have missed you so much! In fact, a year or two ago I commented on your blog wondering how you were and that I missed you. How have you been?? I hope all is well. <3

        Things with me are good! I feel a lot more grounded and balanced thanks to taking an extended online dating break. Work, health/fitness, and kids/family are going well. I'm newly out of physical therapy after a March auto accident. I have a couple mini vacations planned within the next month.

        Please keep in touch even if you aren't active here!
        laurenrors@gmail.com

        Like

  2. 🎵 I miss you 😊
    Welcome back, friend!!!! It’s really good to hear from you again!!!
    I agree with Lauren, PLEASE KEEP IN TOUCH😉
    my.cherieamour@hotmail.com

    Like

  3. Miss you too! Happy to see you, even if it’s just for a bit.

    Like

  4. Welcome back! You’ve been missed. Hope everything is well with you!

    Like

  5. I know it’s been a while. But I hope the pain has eased following your friend’s death. Happy New Year.

    Like

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